Change, Again

Once again I find myself in the uncomfortable position of being supremely excited and yet still struggling to get used to change. I am finally starting to get used to my little brother being married, and now they're expecting their first baby. I am so excited to be an auntie, and absolutely happy for them, but still I struggle. Why can I not let go? Why do I keep grasping for my own dreams instead of trusting God to unfold His dreams for me? Why is it so hard to trust my Savior with my dreams? He is the Creator of the universe, Almighty God, King of kings! Yet I am afraid to let go of my own little, insignificant life and leave it in His hands. I want to trust Him, but I keep finding myself once again clinging to my feeble dreams.

I know His dreams are infinitely better than my own. I know when His perfect timing finally arrives, I will never wish things had gone my way instead of His. I know every day of waiting will be worth it, but why can't I convince my heart of this? When will my heart learn?