Why Do I Worry?

  So often we here distressing news, whether it is world news, local news, news from a friend, or simply a passing comment from a stranger.   Distressing news can so often instigate worry in our hearts, but why?   What really, truly good reason is there to let it?   Over the last few months I have been using Ruth Leamy's devotional book, "Sacred Signposts".   (An excellent book I would highly recommend!)  In Day Two of the final chapter, something she said really gripped my mind and got me thinking.  She asked a simple question.    One which to ask ourselves when something is causing us to worry.   "Is it relevant to you in your current situation?"   How often are our worries focused on some future time or date, or even have no direct impact on us at all?   A verse from Matthew comes to mind.   "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things.  Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."  (v.6:34)    Today, this moment, has enough things to cause worry without borrowing things from another time or place to worry about!
    Besides, when we worry, it's like telling God, "I don't believe You are big enough or strong enough to handle this one by Yourself,  I think I'd better help You figure this one out!"   I would never dream about actually voicing such an arrogant statement, and I'm sure few of you, my readers, would either, but my worry says it nearly every day!    Who am I, who are we, to presume to be able to "help" God, not to mention to imply that He could ever need help?!
   I think, most times, our tendency to worry reveals our lack of truly knowing God.   If we but had a clearer grasp on who and what He is, our worries would evaporate in the brilliance of all that He is!   When you find yourself prone to worry, turn your focus onto God's great power and wisdom.   Often this will need to be a very deliberate, often repeated exercise, but one well worth learning!

Broken Pieces

The Lord has been working in my heart lately. Of course, this is something He does all the time, but sometimes He works in ways that make it easier for us to see, other times He works through difficult circumstances, or in unusual ways. This is one of those times when I'm not sure if I simply notice it more than at other times, or if He's getting ready to do something REALLY big. I think it might be a little of all the above.

One of the things He has been teaching me is that my broken places can be sources of God's light to those around me. Sometimes when we are broken, we try to hide those broken places. We are afraid of being vulnerable, afraid of what other people will think, afraid that, by sharing our brokenness, we will disappoint the expectations of those around us.   Exposing my broken places is kinda scary, but I am trusting that God has a plan for my brokenness, and I am trusting that He will use the broken places to let His light and love shine out to those around me.    And through my willingness to allow God to use my brokenness for His glory, He has begun healing the hurts, the cracks, and the open wounds.  
    He is teaching me that the pain and the bitterness I have been holding onto so tightly is not hurting the ones who have hurt me, but only causes greater pain to my own heart.    As I learn to forgive the people in my past, and my present, who have hurt me and bruised my heart, God is healing those hurts and bruises.   As He heals the hurts, He shows me more of His greatness and love.   As I see more of His love for me, I realise how little I trust Him.   I cannot view God through the filter of my past hurts, but through the brilliance of His great faithfulness and love for me.    I have allowed the people who have hurt me in the past to cloud my view of God. I have placed their offences on God's shoulders, expecting Him to hurt me as the people in my past have hurt me.   God is not like us!   He is infinitely perfect, loving, holy and powerful!   He is all powerful God, Creator of all that I can see and all that I can't see, and yet, HE LOVES ME!   He did not cause my pain, but He did allow it for a reason.   I may never know all the reasons behind what He allows, but He does, and because of His love and faithfulness and power, I CAN TRUST HIM!   People will let me down, but God will not allow ANYTHING into my life that He will not carry me through and use to bring me closer to the woman He wants me to be, a woman He can use to bring Him glory.

Laura Story : Blessings

This is one of my favorite songs right now. Hope you all enjoy it!

Precious Treasures

Isaiah 40:10-11; 28-31

I have been studying through various passages that concern God, His power, and care for His children, and waiting on God. Today I studied word by word through Isaiah chapter 40. This has long been one of my favorite passages, but taking my concordance through and looking up each key word has made it even more rich and deep with meaning. It was such an encouragement to me, that I wanted to share it with you all, that God might use what He has been showing me to encourage someone else. While I studied verses 10 through the end of the chapter, I will focus here on verses 10 and 11, and verses 28-31. (Please take the time to read this entire passage (10-31) as it is all filled with precious treasures. Verses 12-27 are pretty straight forward, with the key words meaning pretty much what we would expect them to mean.)

I will list the key words I found to have particularly rich or deep roots, along with the Strong’s numbers and their alternate meanings. After each verse, I will paraphrase it, pulling in the portions that God used to speak to my heart today.

Verse 10

Lord - H136 ̀Ādônây - and emphatic form of H113 ̀Âdôn - sovereign, ruler, controller, lord, master, owner

GOD - H3069 Jehôvih - self existent one; when used with H136 Elohiym creating Adonai Elohiym, the sovereign self existent one

come - H935 bố - to go or come with implications of going or coming as for war, also to lead or lift up

strong - H2389 châzâq - from H2388 châzaq - to fasten upon, be strong/courageous, to strengthen, cure, help, repair/fortify, to be constant, encourage, hold fast

arm - H2220 zerôâ - arm, with the added meaning of help, mighty, strength

reward - H7939 śâkâr - salary, price, hire, reward, wages

“Look, Adonai Elohiym, the sovereign, self existent one, will come to lead you with strength and courage, His arm will rule with strength and might to help you; See, He brings His wages with Him and His work is before Him, (we don’t have to pay or compensate Him for His help!)”

Verse 11

feed - H7462 rấâh - to tend a flock, to rule, to associate with (as with a friend), to make friendship with, to pastor or shepherd

shepherd - same word as feed

lambs - H2922 telâ - lambs, includes the intent to cover for protection

carry - H5375 nâśấ nâsâh - to lift, bear up, bring , carry, contain, desire, ease, fetch, forgive, help, obtain, pardon, raise up, receive, spare

bosom - H2436 chêyq chêq chôq - to inclose, bosom, lap, midst, within

lead - H5095 nâhal - to run with a sparkle, to flow, conduct, protect, sustain, carry, feed, guide, lead gently

“He will feed His flock as a shepherd tends his sheep, with the care of a friend; He will gather His protected lambs in His arms and lift them up with forgiveness and desire, inclosing them within His bosom. He will sustain those who are with young and gently lead and protect them.”

Verse 28

heard - H8085 shâmâ - to hear intelligently, carefully; to be content, to discern, give ear; be obedient, obey; make a proclamation, publish, report, show forth, tell, understand, witness

everlasting - H5769 ̀ôlâm ̀ôlâm - time out of mind, eternity, always, continuance, eternal, perpetual, at any time, world without end, since the beginning

faint - H3287 yấêph - fatigued, exhausted

searching - H2714 chêqer - finding out

understanding - H8394 tâbûn tebûnâh tôbûnâh - intelligence

“Don’t you know? Weren’t you listening so you could understand and tell others? The God who always is from the beginning and even before the beginning, Yaweh, the self existent One, the Creator of all that you see, never grows tired or weary. His intelligence is so deep that you can’t even find out how great it is!”

Verse 29

gives - H5414 nâthan - gives, also restores

power - H3581 kôach kôach - to be firm, vigor, ability

faint - H3287 yấêph - fatigued, exhausted

might - H202 ̀ôn - ability, power; from same root as H205 âven - to exert oneself in vain, to come to naught

“He restores the vigor of the exhausted and gives strength to the weary. He restores those who are worn out from their futile trying in their own strength.”

Verse 30

faint - H3286 yấaph - to grow tired, as from wearisome flight

fall - H3782 kâshal - to totter or waver because ones legs are weak, to falter, stumble, faint, fall, be cast down, be decayed

“Even children grow tired when the way is weary, and young men grow discouraged and stumble and fall.”

Verse 31

wait upon - H6960 qâvâh - to bind together, expect, look patiently, tarry, wait

mount up - H5927 ̀âlâh - to ascend, come up, dawn, depart, exalt, make to go up/away, grow, increase, leap, recover, restore

wings - H83 ̀êber - wing; from H82 ̀âbar - to soar, fly

“But those who hold tight to Jehovah and wait with patience and expectation for Him will be given new strength. They will rise with the dawn and ascend above their troubles, soaring on wings like eagles, away from the weariness of life.”

Now read it all together and let the truths of these precious verses sink into your very soul. Let them sooth the weariness of life that settles in and pull us down.

“Look, Adonai Elohiym, the sovereign, self existent one, will come to lead you with strength and courage, His arm will rule with strength and might to help you; See, He brings His wages with Him and His work is before Him, (we don’t have to pay or compensate Him for His help!) He will feed His flock as a shepherd tends his sheep, with the care of a friend; He will gather His protected lambs in His arms and lift them up with forgiveness and desire, inclosing them within His bosom. He will sustain those who are with young and gently lead and protect them. Don’t you know? Weren’t you listening so you could understand and tell others? The God who always is from the beginning and even before the beginning, Yaweh, the self existent One, the Creator of all that you see, never grows tired or weary. His intelligence is so deep that you can’t even find out how great it is! He restores the vigor of the exhausted and gives strength to the weary. He restores those who are worn out from their futile trying in their own strength. Even children grow tired when the way is weary, and young men grow discouraged and stumble and fall. But those who hold tight to Jehovah and wait with patience and expectation for Him will be given new strength. They will rise with the dawn and ascend above their troubles, soaring on wings like eagles, away from the weariness of life.”

New Year Thoughts

The old year is gone. All that is left of 2010 is the memories of time gone by. As I look forward to the new year, my thoughts are drawn back to what God has done in the past year. I have seen Him do some pretty amazing and life altering things in the last year. He taught me to trust Him to provide when I went the entire summer without income. Time after time I saw Him provide, just what I needed at exactly the right time. My brother got married in October, and we found out that they're expecting their first baby next summer. I got to care for a wonderful little baby girl the last few months of the year. (Caring for babies is one of the best ways I know to learn patience. Even the best babies will cry sometimes, for reasons that are impossible to discover. You simply have to have patience and do the best you can to comfort them. And sometimes you just have to have a good cry yourself, then a good laugh, and then it doesn't seem so bad after all.)

I am beginning this new year with a new adventure, looking for a new job. I have a lot of options and possibilities. It seems like everyone has a new idea, and they all sound like good ones. So, I'm putting out feelers and trusting God to show me what His will is, praying that He will open the right doors and road block the wrong paths. I am learning to move forward in what seems to be a good direction, then trust Him to guide my turns.

A new year holds the promise of better things to come. I am excited to see what God's better things are for me and how far above and beyond my better things they will be! His ways truly are higher than my ways and following Him is by far more fun than doing things my own way! That's another things He has taught me over the last year. Whenever I try to do things my own way, all I end up with is one BIG mess! When I do things God's way, I get something truly beautiful, even when it is 100% opposite from what I thought I wanted!

Change, Again

Once again I find myself in the uncomfortable position of being supremely excited and yet still struggling to get used to change. I am finally starting to get used to my little brother being married, and now they're expecting their first baby. I am so excited to be an auntie, and absolutely happy for them, but still I struggle. Why can I not let go? Why do I keep grasping for my own dreams instead of trusting God to unfold His dreams for me? Why is it so hard to trust my Savior with my dreams? He is the Creator of the universe, Almighty God, King of kings! Yet I am afraid to let go of my own little, insignificant life and leave it in His hands. I want to trust Him, but I keep finding myself once again clinging to my feeble dreams.

I know His dreams are infinitely better than my own. I know when His perfect timing finally arrives, I will never wish things had gone my way instead of His. I know every day of waiting will be worth it, but why can't I convince my heart of this? When will my heart learn?

Quiet

I love the quiet of morning, before anyone else is up. It is just me and Jesus and the quiet. This is when He speaks to me, to my heart and the troubles I keep hidden there. Today He shows me that He is the answer to those troubles, all of them, every single one. Not a single trouble is too big for Him to take care of. I know this. I know my God is big. I know He is powerful. I know He can take care of me. I know His plans are perfect. So why am I afraid? Why do I keep wondering if He has forgotten me in my little corner of life? Why do I still feel like my life has gone on and left me behind? I know I am where He has for me today. This is what I must focus on. Today. Today is all that I truly have. Yesterday is gone forever, tomorrow is not here yet and never guaranteed to come at all. Today is a gift, this is how I must view it, a gift to be filled with adventure, if I can find some.

I am often left feeling like my life is terribly ordinary. I don't want to be ordinary, but I don't know how to be anything else. This is what I have always been. How does one change what has always been? Ordinary used to be comfortable, but it is becoming like an old shoe. At first it is comfortable because you have gotten used to it, it has worn to the shape of your unique foot. But after a while, the sole begins to wear thin and your big toe begins to poke through. That is the way ordinary feels. Irritating and constraining. I know there is something more out there that God has in store for me, but what? And when? I grow weary with waiting, but still I must wait, and trust. For you never know what tomorrow may hold, but I know Who holds tomorrow!